Saint Kuriakose Elias Chavara’s Message to Parents


Pious Joseph

  1. A good Christian Family resembles to heavenly abode. All the members in the family who are either related by birth or bonded in nuptial relations shall regard the elders in high esteem and live together in unity and solidarity. Every person shall maintain highest dignity and aim salvation in all his words and deeds.
  2. Your children are divine investments and they shall be brought up in the best way possible and you shall extend to them all kinds of protection. They are to purified in the Holy Grail, made his disciple and to be committed to Him on the Day of Judgment. This is the responsibility that Lord Jesus has assigned to you.
  3. All the members in a family shall have a deep rooted love for one another. This underlying love can bring in peace and friendship in the family, which in turn enables them to face the troubles and tribulations with utmost calm and thereby they overcome all the tragedies in life.
  4. In every family there shall be order and peace and they shall always have concern for eternal salvation. It may be noted that many a good family had plunged into utter ruins owing to its absence.
  5. They shall be given good books worth reading. The parents shall take special care that undesirable publications do not reach them. Possessing indecent publications is like keep fire on a haystack.
  6. You shall take extreme care in the upbringing of your children. You shall make it a daily practice that you will remember them in your prayers.
  7. Parents shall keep a close watch in the educational pursuits of their children. It must be ensured frequently that they do not be trapped into undesirable friendships.
  8. Parents must also be very moderate in blaming and punishing their children. Gentle words carry more weight than high-sounding outcries.
  9. Children must be taught to say their prayers at an early stage. Let them grow up in a strong faith of God.
  10. Your daily routines shall be punctual and in order. It shall not be like a loose bound book.
  11. Parents shall also ensure that their children are given ample freedom when they attain the age of discretion to choose their vocation.
  12. Parents shall also see that they prepare there will when in good health and discretion and that the family property may be divided according to the rules and customs in force.
  13. It is the sacred duty of the children to respect their parents diligently. They shall be taken care of as a treasure in their old age and sickness. Such children are eligible for the grace of God.

   14. Your relationship and friendship shall be highly prudent. It shall be ensured that               your friendship is extended to morally and ethically good people.

  1.  Responding with a vengeance is cruel. It must be borne in mind that a good character can be expected from a person of reason and patience.
  2. Do not drag petty differences into courts of law. That can move hearts into farther zones.
  3. Do not borrow money from others. Such insolvency can lead even your children to trouble after your life.
  4. Do not expose your opulence. Be humble in words and activities. You must also discard luxuries in marriages. A burning fire in haystack is momentary. But a small light shedding from a little lamp can remain for a very long time.
  5.  Luxury and miserliness are the two sides of the same coin. Both can lead you to evil designs. Your money should be utilized for common good. Otherwise you will be doing unethical things.
  6.  You shall keep relationships with God-loving people. Material gains shall not be your sole aim.
  7. Industriousness shall be maintained in your homes. Do not while away your time. Sloth leads you to many vices.
  8. Liquor is a major vice and shall not be allowed to enter your home. Many families have been destroyed by this evil.
  9. 23. Be upright in your business activities. Whatever you amass through dishonesty and tricks can be dissolved like a mass of snow.
  10. There shall not be any day in your life, which is not devoted to others with some kind of help. God will not count that day as part of your life. You must also see that alms-seekers are not driven away.
  11. Your servants shall be given appropriate remuneration. Do not talk ill of the poor and the weak. If you do so their tears shall bear witness against you in the heavenly court of God.
  12. There is a panacea for maintaining the divine light in your homes. That is the Holy Mass conducted in the church. Make sure at least one member of your family attending it daily.
  13. Is it sufficient to attend the holy mass on Sundays and on the days of obligation? No! That day must be devoted for reading good books, doing good things and for listening to gospel discourse. You must also find time to visit the poor and the sick.
  14. You shall not default your family prayer at any cost. You shall say your prayers with all members at the appointed time. Let that be a witness to others as well

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